STUCK

I've reached a point in my life where I believe that I am what can be described in no other words than STUCK!!! When i graduated from high school I had a plan, a college to attend, a career I wanted to achieve, and a life I've so desperately wanted to live. I wanted to make something of myself. But as I sit here two years later I feel so lost. All the things I never thought would happen have some how unfolded in my life like a script written by an opponent who only wishes to see me fail. But I haven't failed and  I don't intend to. I feel my self floating above water at times sinking below but not enough to drown. Sometimes it feels like my lungs are filling with water and I can't breathe, speak, or move. Because I'm STUCK!!! I loved college but had to take time off and I've been working my ass off to pay what I owe so I can go back, but it feels as tho as far and as much as I get done something comes up and it just isn't enough. I'm so far away from all my friends and it seems as tho I try so hard but I have no one , no one but myself. The world is a crushing place when all you have is yourself to depend on. When you are the only one there to console you when things go wrong. I know things will get better, there would be tough times and easier times, but I wish there was a time limit on pain, stress, and suffering because then I'd know when the sun would truly smile again. But until things get better I suppose I'm much like a caterpillar in its hard callous cocoon, trapped until the time comes for me to change into the beautiful butterfly I was meant to be... Until then I'm just STUCK!!!

The untold truth...C.Mone`